So you're now single or with someone new. . .but you can't get your ex out of your mind. You're always thinking "How can I get my ex to love me again. . ." And then you probably push the thought away because it seems impossible. The good news is that you can get your ex back in your arms. It has been done before, and not infrequently, and it can be done again, by you.
Men and women get out of relationships for different reasons, many of which are not understood by the opposite sex because men's and women's brains are wired differently. This makes things even more confusing. Some situations seem to be pretty straight-forward but most aren't.
So before we tackle your goal of getting your ex back, let's take a look at why he or she isn't around in the first place.
Why do men leave relationships? It's pretty simple, really. They leave when they aren't getting what they need. And one sure thing that they need is admiration and respect. It might be for that reason that they they left . . .and maybe they found it somewhere else. One of the most common reasons men give for leaving their wife or girlfriend is “No matter what I did, I couldn’t make her happy!”
Why do women leave relationships? They leave because they feel unappreciated and/or they leave because they are bored. What do you commonly hear from unhappy women? “He doesn’t appreciate a thing I do!”
Now, you might think that your ex's reasons for leaving don't fit into one of those categories. You may be thinking, "my husband left me because I cheated on him." But why did you cheat on him in the first place? It probably has something to do with the fact that you weren't getting the attention and appreciation you needed. Or maybe you're thinking. . .although that's not an excuse. Or maybe you're thinking "My girlfriend left me because I was never around." But ask yourself, why were you never around?
Now that you're not in continuous contact with your ex, you can take time to look at things more objectively. Use this time constructively to list all the positive and negative factors in your relationship. In the meantime, make sure you take care of yourself, eat healthy foods and exercise when possible.
Then, after you've had time to concentrate on yourself and look at your relationship with more objective eyes, you can think about making that first contact with your ex. Ask him or her out for coffee in a nonchalant manner. If he or she says yes, go out, talk about light non-threatening subjects and keep it short. At the end of the date, don't re-schedule another unless your ex suggests it. So, in answer to your question "Can I get my ex to love me again?" Yes, you can!
The date may go well, the date may go ok or the date may go terribly. In the last case, you'll need to re-evaluate your situation and see if you want to continue trying later on or if you need to think about moving on.
But if the date goes well, you will see how the answer to "Can I Get My Ex to Love Me Again?" is "Yes, I can!"
Thursday 17 November 2011
Monday 14 November 2011
Your Question - How To Get My Wife To Love Me Again - Your Answer Here
It's a tough one you've been asking yourself for a while now. . . "How to get my wife to love me again?"
There are many avenues that need to be explored when coming up with an answer to your question and of course the answers depend on your specific situation and circumstances. But there are some basic strategies that any man can apply towards gaining his wife's love back.
First, you need to figure out why your wife has stopped loving you (or why she says that she doesn't love you anymore, even if that may not be true).
What are some common reasons for this?
Reason Number 1:
I've lost my wife's love because I had an affair and she found out.
Reason Number 2:
My wife found someone new that she feels is better than me.
Reason Number 3:
I haven't stuck to my promises and agreements. I promised her that I would change my attitude or some of the things that annoy her but I haven't done so. This has lead to disappointment and loss of hope on her part.
Reason Number 4:
I neglected my wife in her eyes. I didn't give her the love and attention she needed.
Reason Number 5: I tried to control everything she did. I didn't allow my wife enough freedom and space to do what she wanted.
Once you've identified the reason or combination of reasons, you can start to go to work on the problem. Many marriages that fail do so because the real problems aren't really understood. Communication is a huge part of making the marriage work - and men think differently than women so even if you think you know how your wife feels about something (because that's the way you feel), chances are you probably don't. So talk to her.
Without the right communication, it's really hard to resolve and kind of conflict, big or small. The right kind of communication will allow your damaged relationship to start recuperating and later to thrive if you give your wife the opportunity to share her dreams, concerns, hopes and desires with you.
If your wife has conceded to trying in the marriage again, don't just go back to what wasn't working. Keep things interesting, do little things to show your wife how much you love and appreciate her or do something pleasantly surprising.
Keeping your promises is another important part of the equation. If you haven't kept your promises in the past, start doing so now. Your past broken promises have no doubt ruined the trust in your relationship but you can start repairing that now.
Finally, give your wife the space and time she needs. Let her know that you are there for her but don't smother her.
Hopefully the above information is enough to get you started working on your solving your big concern of "How to get my wife to love me again".
There are many avenues that need to be explored when coming up with an answer to your question and of course the answers depend on your specific situation and circumstances. But there are some basic strategies that any man can apply towards gaining his wife's love back.
First, you need to figure out why your wife has stopped loving you (or why she says that she doesn't love you anymore, even if that may not be true).
What are some common reasons for this?
Reason Number 1:
I've lost my wife's love because I had an affair and she found out.
Reason Number 2:
My wife found someone new that she feels is better than me.
Reason Number 3:
I haven't stuck to my promises and agreements. I promised her that I would change my attitude or some of the things that annoy her but I haven't done so. This has lead to disappointment and loss of hope on her part.
Reason Number 4:
I neglected my wife in her eyes. I didn't give her the love and attention she needed.
Reason Number 5: I tried to control everything she did. I didn't allow my wife enough freedom and space to do what she wanted.
Once you've identified the reason or combination of reasons, you can start to go to work on the problem. Many marriages that fail do so because the real problems aren't really understood. Communication is a huge part of making the marriage work - and men think differently than women so even if you think you know how your wife feels about something (because that's the way you feel), chances are you probably don't. So talk to her.
Without the right communication, it's really hard to resolve and kind of conflict, big or small. The right kind of communication will allow your damaged relationship to start recuperating and later to thrive if you give your wife the opportunity to share her dreams, concerns, hopes and desires with you.
If your wife has conceded to trying in the marriage again, don't just go back to what wasn't working. Keep things interesting, do little things to show your wife how much you love and appreciate her or do something pleasantly surprising.
Keeping your promises is another important part of the equation. If you haven't kept your promises in the past, start doing so now. Your past broken promises have no doubt ruined the trust in your relationship but you can start repairing that now.
Finally, give your wife the space and time she needs. Let her know that you are there for her but don't smother her.
Hopefully the above information is enough to get you started working on your solving your big concern of "How to get my wife to love me again".
You Dont Want Divorce 3 Ways To Stop It
Things aren’t going well, but you don’t want divorce to end your relationship. What can you do? If you don’t want divorce there are three specific things you can do to stop it.
These tips won’t work in every situation—some relationships are too far gone. But most relationships start having troubles long before they reach this point, thankfully.
When you don’t want divorce but your partner does, try being quiet for a while.Just don’t say anything. Stop complaining. The worst thing you can do is to carry on about how you don’t want to get divorced.
You can let your partner know that you don’t want the divorce. And that’s about all you can do. Perhaps you could reassure them that couples go through this kind of thing all the time and are still together today. Just don’t do it more than once.
If you carry on and carry on about how you want to stay together, you’ll probably just annoy your partner, making it less likely for him to be open to the idea of staying together. The whole point is to make yourself extra desirable to your partner again.
It’s unlikely he or she finds you particularly desirable when you’re complaining and whining about inconsequential things. That tendency to complain and even nag may have had something to do with why the relationship broke up in the first place, remember.
You want to show your very best side to your partner at all times. When you started dating this person, you were probably on your own very best behavior. Everyone does that to win a mate’s heart. Then as things start to stagnate a little because the mate is won and there’s no need to compete with others anymore, the tendency to whine and complain begins.
Stop this immediately and go back to your very best “going to win them” courting behavior. That is often such a switch from the way things were in the beginning, that it seems almost too good to be true.
Going hand in hand with taking care not to complain or nag is learning to simply be agreeable. We tend to take our partner for granted and when he or she suggests something we’re not happy with, we make it known. If we do that too often it can start to seem to our partner that they can’t do or say anything right!
If you don’t want divorce then learn to agree with your partner even when you don’t want to. That might sound a little extreme, but you’re in rescue mode right now. You just want to do everything you can to save the marriage. It doesn’t’ mean that you’ll never be able to disagree with them for the rest of your life.
You need to learn to not whine, to agree and to do it all with a smile on your face. If you don’t want divorce you’ll have to do these things for at least a little while.
These tips won’t work in every situation—some relationships are too far gone. But most relationships start having troubles long before they reach this point, thankfully.
When you don’t want divorce but your partner does, try being quiet for a while.Just don’t say anything. Stop complaining. The worst thing you can do is to carry on about how you don’t want to get divorced.
You can let your partner know that you don’t want the divorce. And that’s about all you can do. Perhaps you could reassure them that couples go through this kind of thing all the time and are still together today. Just don’t do it more than once.
If you carry on and carry on about how you want to stay together, you’ll probably just annoy your partner, making it less likely for him to be open to the idea of staying together. The whole point is to make yourself extra desirable to your partner again.
It’s unlikely he or she finds you particularly desirable when you’re complaining and whining about inconsequential things. That tendency to complain and even nag may have had something to do with why the relationship broke up in the first place, remember.
You want to show your very best side to your partner at all times. When you started dating this person, you were probably on your own very best behavior. Everyone does that to win a mate’s heart. Then as things start to stagnate a little because the mate is won and there’s no need to compete with others anymore, the tendency to whine and complain begins.
Stop this immediately and go back to your very best “going to win them” courting behavior. That is often such a switch from the way things were in the beginning, that it seems almost too good to be true.
Going hand in hand with taking care not to complain or nag is learning to simply be agreeable. We tend to take our partner for granted and when he or she suggests something we’re not happy with, we make it known. If we do that too often it can start to seem to our partner that they can’t do or say anything right!
If you don’t want divorce then learn to agree with your partner even when you don’t want to. That might sound a little extreme, but you’re in rescue mode right now. You just want to do everything you can to save the marriage. It doesn’t’ mean that you’ll never be able to disagree with them for the rest of your life.
You need to learn to not whine, to agree and to do it all with a smile on your face. If you don’t want divorce you’ll have to do these things for at least a little while.
Women Men Love And Women Men Leave
There are two types of women in the world, women men love women men leave. Which one are you? It doesn't really matter which side you fall on at this point, if you read and use the information in this article you can become the women men love for the rest of your life.
The first step to make sure your man will love you the way you want to be loved, is to know what it is your man needs in the relationship and then give it to him. This seemingly simple thing is messed up more often than you would believe. Many women will think this means to be completely subservient to their man and do whatever he wants even if she doesn't want to do it.
Nothing could be further from the truth. In reality no man (unless he's "damaged goods" which you wouldn't want to be in a relationship with anyway) wants a women who is a door mat. A real man will like his women to have a mind of her own, but he also wants her to be his biggest fan.
Women tend to think that if they give their man all the sex he wants, and if they dress up in sexy lingerie they are meeting all their mans needs. Again, if that is truly all your man needs you might want to find a man with a little more depth. It's a misconception that all men want is sex. Yes, sex is an important part of a relationship, for men and women, but it shouldn't be the do all, end all in any relationship, if it is your relationship will fail, it's just a matter of time.
In order to really form a long lasting bond you need to base your relationship on more than just physical intimacy. Whether we like it or not, we will all get older and as we do sex will become more difficult for various physical reasons. If your whole relationship is just based on physical intimacy, how can it survive once that is taken out of the equation?
The women that men leave, believe it or not, are the women who try too hard to be whatever he wants. Your man needs to feel special and loved, admired, and desired, but it won't mean very much to him if it doesn't seem sincere. If he feels like you are just being pliable he will quickly get bored and move on to someone more 'real'.
So for all you women out there, you do have a choice. You can be either type of women: women men love women men leave. It's entirely up to you. It doesn't mean giving up your own identity, it just means trying to understand your man and what he really wants and needs from you.
The first step to make sure your man will love you the way you want to be loved, is to know what it is your man needs in the relationship and then give it to him. This seemingly simple thing is messed up more often than you would believe. Many women will think this means to be completely subservient to their man and do whatever he wants even if she doesn't want to do it.
Nothing could be further from the truth. In reality no man (unless he's "damaged goods" which you wouldn't want to be in a relationship with anyway) wants a women who is a door mat. A real man will like his women to have a mind of her own, but he also wants her to be his biggest fan.
Women tend to think that if they give their man all the sex he wants, and if they dress up in sexy lingerie they are meeting all their mans needs. Again, if that is truly all your man needs you might want to find a man with a little more depth. It's a misconception that all men want is sex. Yes, sex is an important part of a relationship, for men and women, but it shouldn't be the do all, end all in any relationship, if it is your relationship will fail, it's just a matter of time.
In order to really form a long lasting bond you need to base your relationship on more than just physical intimacy. Whether we like it or not, we will all get older and as we do sex will become more difficult for various physical reasons. If your whole relationship is just based on physical intimacy, how can it survive once that is taken out of the equation?
The women that men leave, believe it or not, are the women who try too hard to be whatever he wants. Your man needs to feel special and loved, admired, and desired, but it won't mean very much to him if it doesn't seem sincere. If he feels like you are just being pliable he will quickly get bored and move on to someone more 'real'.
So for all you women out there, you do have a choice. You can be either type of women: women men love women men leave. It's entirely up to you. It doesn't mean giving up your own identity, it just means trying to understand your man and what he really wants and needs from you.
Win Your Love Back The Example Of Katie And Brad
You can win your love and get your ex back. Let me give you an example.
Katie made a major mistake. She saw Brad talking to her best friend Andrea and thought he was flirting with her. Katie worked herself into a fury and broke up with Brad.
It turns out that he was really consulting Andrea on how to put together a surprise romantic Valentine’s date. He was really hurt that Katie would think so little of him and didn’t want to have to do anything to do with her after that.
You may think that you can not win your love back after such a situation. But let me tell you what Katie did to get Brad back.
Brad wasn’t talking to her, so she couldn’t discuss the situation with him. But she could write him a letter. She got some nice paper and hand wrote an apology. She admitted that she had flown off the handle. She also told him what she liked about him and about the relationship. Finally, she expressed gratitude for his thoughtfulness in planning a romantic date.
Then, she shut up. She didn’t call, text or email him for a week. By not pestering him, she gave him time to work through his emotions.
After a week, she sent him a short and sweet “thinking of you” email. She kept it casual.
Brad was obviously nuts about Katie because he was willing to go to the trouble of impressing her on Valentine’s day. But, he was also hurt. Because Katie had apologized and given him time to work through his emotions, he was able to respond to the “thinking of you” email.
The night he got the email, he called Katie. She tried to keep things light and fun. Brad appreciated that. So, he suggested they meet for coffee and Katie agreed.
Katie went out of her way to look like a million bucks. She wore the earrings Brad had given her for Christmas and she put on the perfume that he liked so much.
Katie decided that she would only talk about positive things. She especially tried to bring fond memories into the conversation. She also asked about his family because that would reinforce their shared history and closeness.
Brad appreciated this. He loved Katie and didn’t want things to end. But, he didn’t want a repeat of the situation either. He needed to be reassured that their life together wouldn’t be filled with needless drama. He also needed to know that talking to another woman wouldn’t set off fireworks.
The couple agreed that they would take the relationship to a less intense level. They would really court each other again. They would stop taking each other for granted.
A year later, Brad and Katie agree that the break up may have actually saved their relationship over the long haul. While Katie initially flew off the handle, her calm handling of the situation afterward made it possible for them to move on. She showed you can win your love and get your ex back.
Katie made a major mistake. She saw Brad talking to her best friend Andrea and thought he was flirting with her. Katie worked herself into a fury and broke up with Brad.
It turns out that he was really consulting Andrea on how to put together a surprise romantic Valentine’s date. He was really hurt that Katie would think so little of him and didn’t want to have to do anything to do with her after that.
You may think that you can not win your love back after such a situation. But let me tell you what Katie did to get Brad back.
Brad wasn’t talking to her, so she couldn’t discuss the situation with him. But she could write him a letter. She got some nice paper and hand wrote an apology. She admitted that she had flown off the handle. She also told him what she liked about him and about the relationship. Finally, she expressed gratitude for his thoughtfulness in planning a romantic date.
Then, she shut up. She didn’t call, text or email him for a week. By not pestering him, she gave him time to work through his emotions.
After a week, she sent him a short and sweet “thinking of you” email. She kept it casual.
Brad was obviously nuts about Katie because he was willing to go to the trouble of impressing her on Valentine’s day. But, he was also hurt. Because Katie had apologized and given him time to work through his emotions, he was able to respond to the “thinking of you” email.
The night he got the email, he called Katie. She tried to keep things light and fun. Brad appreciated that. So, he suggested they meet for coffee and Katie agreed.
Katie went out of her way to look like a million bucks. She wore the earrings Brad had given her for Christmas and she put on the perfume that he liked so much.
Katie decided that she would only talk about positive things. She especially tried to bring fond memories into the conversation. She also asked about his family because that would reinforce their shared history and closeness.
Brad appreciated this. He loved Katie and didn’t want things to end. But, he didn’t want a repeat of the situation either. He needed to be reassured that their life together wouldn’t be filled with needless drama. He also needed to know that talking to another woman wouldn’t set off fireworks.
The couple agreed that they would take the relationship to a less intense level. They would really court each other again. They would stop taking each other for granted.
A year later, Brad and Katie agree that the break up may have actually saved their relationship over the long haul. While Katie initially flew off the handle, her calm handling of the situation afterward made it possible for them to move on. She showed you can win your love and get your ex back.
Win Love Back - Make Your Ex Love You Again
Have you recently experienced a breakup, and now you are hoping that you can win love back?
Getting your ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend to fall madly in love with you once again is an endeavor that can be quite difficult. However, if you want to get your ex back, and you have the dedication and the patience to achieve it, you may be able to make it happen.
The first thing you need to do in order to win love back is to figure out what went wrong in the relationship in the first place. What did you do, or what did your ex do, in order to make the relationship dissolve?
You need to be able to address the problems in the relationship in order to win love back.
If you cannot rectify the issues that led to the breakup, then you are not going to be able to win love and get your ex back back when it comes to your relationship.
If you want to win back his heart, then you are going to have to proceed slowly but surely. If you messed up and did something wrong and that led to the dissolving of your relationship, then what you need to do is apologize, and work to regain the trust of your ex.
Are you certain that you want to win love back in the first place? Do you want your ex back or are you simply afraid to be alone? What is going to keep you from messing things up again? Are you dedicated to repairing the relationship once and for all, or might you slip up again?
If you are sure that you want to rekindle things, and you are sure that your goal is to win love back, then you need to let him know by apologizing for the problems in the past, communicating better with him than ever before, and giving him the space that he needs to figure out what he wants to do in the relationship. If you do not give him any space, the results of the relationship will not be to your liking.
Find out what it is that caused the relationship to fall apart, and fix it. If he was bored with you, find a way to liven things up. If you cheated on him, find a way to prove that you've stopped. Once you can undo the underlying causes of the break up, you and your ex can start learning to rebuild things in a healthy and proactive way and this will allow you to win love back once and for all.
Learning how to win love back and get your ex back is all about knowing what went wrong the first time around so that you can prevent it from happening again. It may take some serious time and effort, but the investment is well worthwhile when you consider the positive results that are possible in situations like these.
Getting your ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend to fall madly in love with you once again is an endeavor that can be quite difficult. However, if you want to get your ex back, and you have the dedication and the patience to achieve it, you may be able to make it happen.
The first thing you need to do in order to win love back is to figure out what went wrong in the relationship in the first place. What did you do, or what did your ex do, in order to make the relationship dissolve?
You need to be able to address the problems in the relationship in order to win love back.
If you cannot rectify the issues that led to the breakup, then you are not going to be able to win love and get your ex back back when it comes to your relationship.
If you want to win back his heart, then you are going to have to proceed slowly but surely. If you messed up and did something wrong and that led to the dissolving of your relationship, then what you need to do is apologize, and work to regain the trust of your ex.
Are you certain that you want to win love back in the first place? Do you want your ex back or are you simply afraid to be alone? What is going to keep you from messing things up again? Are you dedicated to repairing the relationship once and for all, or might you slip up again?
If you are sure that you want to rekindle things, and you are sure that your goal is to win love back, then you need to let him know by apologizing for the problems in the past, communicating better with him than ever before, and giving him the space that he needs to figure out what he wants to do in the relationship. If you do not give him any space, the results of the relationship will not be to your liking.
Find out what it is that caused the relationship to fall apart, and fix it. If he was bored with you, find a way to liven things up. If you cheated on him, find a way to prove that you've stopped. Once you can undo the underlying causes of the break up, you and your ex can start learning to rebuild things in a healthy and proactive way and this will allow you to win love back once and for all.
Learning how to win love back and get your ex back is all about knowing what went wrong the first time around so that you can prevent it from happening again. It may take some serious time and effort, but the investment is well worthwhile when you consider the positive results that are possible in situations like these.
Win Love Back Allow Your Ex Time Space
Do you want to win love back? The key is allowing your ex to have a little bit of time to figure out what they want from the relationship. Tim and Rhonda learned this from Tim’s friend Joe.
Rhonda stormed out of Tim’s apartment one day saying she never wanted to see him again. Tim was stunned. All he could think about was how to win love back.
He called his buddy Joe and asked whether he should send flowers or candy.
“Neither,” Joe said. “And don’t call, email, or text her either.”
Tim was stunned by this advice. He wanted to win love back right away before Rhonda had a chance to “look around” and find someone better.
But Joe told Tim that giving Rhonda the space to “look around” was just what she needed. There was a small chance that she would go forever, but the probability was that she would settle down and come back to him. She must come to the conclusion that their relationship was special on her own terms.
Further, Joe advised, it would be bad if Tim looked too desperate. This gave Rhonda the upper hand in many ways. It would lead to further grand gestures in the future. If he wanted to get the relationship back on track, Tim needed to give Rhonda space.
Tim and Rhonda both had a lot invested in the relationship. They had been together 18 months and had even talked about marriage. This was why it was such a blow to Tim when Rhonda walked out.
But Tim took Joe’s advice, as painful as it was, and waited for Rhonda to call. It took her four days, but she finally contacted him.
The first thing she wanted to know was “why didn’t you call me?” He told her “I was waiting for you to call. I knew you needed space.”
He was right, and she knew it. She actually appreciated the fact that he hadn’t called. She knew that he had found a way to win love back.
As they talked about hwere their relationship had been and how to get it back on track, they discovered that one of the problems was that they had been crowding one another. The thought of getting married had been suffocating.
So, they decided to back off. They would still see each other exclusively, but they would make more time for friends and solo activities. They wouldn’t talk about marriage again for six months.
Tim restrained himself from pursuing Rhonda when she needed space. This allowed her to reevaluate her relationship with him on her own terms.
She initially thought that he would call her all the time. She was actually surprised that he didn’t. But, because he refrained from contacting her, she was able to see what her life was like without him in it. And, it wasn’t as pleasant as she had imagined it would be.
So, if you’re determined to win love back, keep in mind that sometime what is needed is a little space.
Rhonda stormed out of Tim’s apartment one day saying she never wanted to see him again. Tim was stunned. All he could think about was how to win love back.
He called his buddy Joe and asked whether he should send flowers or candy.
“Neither,” Joe said. “And don’t call, email, or text her either.”
Tim was stunned by this advice. He wanted to win love back right away before Rhonda had a chance to “look around” and find someone better.
But Joe told Tim that giving Rhonda the space to “look around” was just what she needed. There was a small chance that she would go forever, but the probability was that she would settle down and come back to him. She must come to the conclusion that their relationship was special on her own terms.
Further, Joe advised, it would be bad if Tim looked too desperate. This gave Rhonda the upper hand in many ways. It would lead to further grand gestures in the future. If he wanted to get the relationship back on track, Tim needed to give Rhonda space.
Tim and Rhonda both had a lot invested in the relationship. They had been together 18 months and had even talked about marriage. This was why it was such a blow to Tim when Rhonda walked out.
But Tim took Joe’s advice, as painful as it was, and waited for Rhonda to call. It took her four days, but she finally contacted him.
The first thing she wanted to know was “why didn’t you call me?” He told her “I was waiting for you to call. I knew you needed space.”
He was right, and she knew it. She actually appreciated the fact that he hadn’t called. She knew that he had found a way to win love back.
As they talked about hwere their relationship had been and how to get it back on track, they discovered that one of the problems was that they had been crowding one another. The thought of getting married had been suffocating.
So, they decided to back off. They would still see each other exclusively, but they would make more time for friends and solo activities. They wouldn’t talk about marriage again for six months.
Tim restrained himself from pursuing Rhonda when she needed space. This allowed her to reevaluate her relationship with him on her own terms.
She initially thought that he would call her all the time. She was actually surprised that he didn’t. But, because he refrained from contacting her, she was able to see what her life was like without him in it. And, it wasn’t as pleasant as she had imagined it would be.
So, if you’re determined to win love back, keep in mind that sometime what is needed is a little space.
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